WARNING SIGNS INDICATING A BULLY
> 2/24/2006 12:03:23 PM

A bully often

  • Seeks to dominate and/or manipulate others.
  • Enjoys feeling powerful and in control (whether real or not).
  • Is both a poor winner (boastful and arrogant) and a poor loser.
  • Seems to derive satisfaction from otherís fears, discomfort, or pain.
  • Is good at hiding behaviors or doing them where adults canít notice.
  • Is excited by conflicts between others.
  • Blames others for his/her problems.
  • Displays uncontrolled anger.
  • Has a history of discipline problems.
  • Displays a pattern of impulsive and chronic hitting, intimidating, and aggressive behaviors.
  • Has a history of violent and aggressive behaviors.
  • Displays intolerance and prejudice towards others.
  • May use drugs, alcohol or be a member of a gang.
  • Lacks empathy towards others.

IF YOU THINK YOUR CHILD IS A BULLY

  • Be sure that your child knows that bullying is NOT acceptable behavior.
  • Tell your child the penalties for bullying and be sure that you enforce them fairly and consistently.
  • Help your child learn alternative ways to deal with anger and frustration.
  • Teach and reward more appropriate behavior.
  • Work out a way for your child to make amends for the bullying.
  • Help your child develop an understanding of the impact of their bullying on the target.
  • Seek help or counseling if the behavior continues.
  • If contacted by the school, STAY CALM; TRY NOT TO BECOME ANGRY AND DEFENSIVE! Make yourself really listen. Remember this is ultimately about the well-being of your child!

Prevent your child from becoming a BULLY:

  • Present yourself as a model of non-violent behavior.
  • Clearly state that violence is not acceptable.
  • Assist your child in finding non-violent strategies for anger management and conflict resolution.
  • Seek help from mental health/school counselors to help stop bullying and aggressive behavior.


Excerpt from www.samhsa.gov


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